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By: Zipperhead
Date: 2/24/98 6:25:00 PM
# Replies: 93
Ok gang lets here it on why Ralf should be spanked. With what and How hard. Lets form sure hear from all the ladies out there.
Response #1
By: Da Sissop
Date: 2/24/98 6:38:53 PM
Well I can't speak for the ladies, but I think Ralf should be soundly spanked with a BFG1000 in Quake 2.
Response #2
By: sooz
Date: 2/24/98 8:26:22 PM
I don't know about you, but when I got to the page of this bbs where it lists the separate groups, and saw "Why Ralf Needs a Spanking", I laughed so hard I nearly cried.
I'm so sorry, Ralf. I didn't mean to create something THIS fun.
Response #3
By: rorschach
Date: 2/24/98 9:07:09 PM
I'm a LITTLE confused (which is a big improvement over my normal state of affairs...) am I the only one not IN on this joke? who is this zipperhead guy? is this ralf's evil twin? (aka Skippy Gunn) or am I totally out in left field....
Response #4
By: Kathy
Date: 2/24/98 9:33:39 PM
Zippy's not right...
Response #5
By: Cleotis
Date: 2/24/98 9:54:36 PM
I think it's kind of like that crazy kid in the movie "Primal Fear".
See, Zipperhead is really David, and Ralf is just a facade.
Is this an ops only board?
Response #6
By: Homer The Brave
Date: 2/24/98 10:58:04 PM
Mm.
Chaos.
Response #7
By: Zipperhead
Date: 2/25/98 9:15:37 AM
Well gang we are off to a good start. I am nor will I ever be Ralf's evil twin. Just someone who is himself somewhere in left field himeself. I just feel that we should liven things up a bit. Oh, and as for this Kathy person, she is a very ver evil person. And I will say Young Lady you are crusing. I will create some new subjects to talk about soon. I think you will all like them.
Response #8
By: Jay
Date: 2/25/98 10:08:10 AM
My guess is that at one point in their lives Zip spanked Kathy soundly...
...Ralph should be spanked as a distraction so that we can smuggle this huge tractor-trailer full of Coors into Georgia for the Fatman and the Dwarf....
Response #9
By: Susan
Date: 2/25/98 1:05:37 PM
I knew a guy once who went by the name Zippy the Pin Head. Any relation Zipperhead? Ralph?
Response #10
By: Zipperhead
Date: 2/25/98 2:54:55 PM
No Susan. But thanks for asking.
Response #11
By: Ralf
Date: 2/25/98 6:59:32 PM
Sigh...
No, it's not me. I swear it. If Skippy ever made a comeback I assure you he would not be a spank-crazy zipperguy. I will testify on whatever stack of holy writ deemed necessary:
I AM NOT ZIPPERHEAD, NOR HAVE I EVER RECEIVED NOR ADMINISTERED A SPANKING.
(Except for once, when sooz and I went through our "experimental" phase of the relationship...)
Response #12
By: Zipperhead
Date: 2/25/98 7:22:21 PM
Wow...Ralf you are my idol
Response #13
By: sooz
Date: 2/25/98 9:03:42 PM
We did no such thing. (did we?)
Response #14
By: Kathy
Date: 2/25/98 9:37:21 PM
All I need to do now is teach my mother how to log in here...
Response #15
By: Gowan McGland
Date: 2/25/98 11:22:46 PM
Lamont. Zipperhead is Lamont.
Of course, we never figured out who he was, so, we're back to square one.
Response #16
By: Homer The Brave
Date: 2/26/98 6:10:33 AM
Skippy would have more style. And more to say about UFOs.
Response #17
By: Zipperhead
Date: 2/26/98 8:04:08 AM
Style? HA! And fear not Homer I WILL have more to say on that subject in time. And Kathy whats up with your mother comming here, You need a chaparone?
Response #18
By: Jay
Date: 2/26/98 10:48:18 AM
Lamont...now that was a class act...where is Dave the midget when we need him?
Response #19
By: Kathy
Date: 2/26/98 10:32:58 PM
I need a decent parental influence in my life from ONE of my parents.
Response #20
By: Zipperhead
Date: 2/27/98 6:19:55 AM
I love to meet your parents Kathy. Hey whats up with not filling out a profile here.
Response #21
By: Kathy
Date: 2/28/98 1:51:51 AM
What do you want to know?
Response #22
By: Zipperhead
Date: 2/28/98 8:08:38 AM
Fill out a Profile!!
Response #23
By: Homer The Brave
Date: 2/28/98 10:31:39 PM
"..somebody's had too much to think.."
Response #24
By: Zane T. Dark
Date: 3/1/98 7:36:26 AM
"My brain hurts!"
Response #25
By: Grace
Date: 3/1/98 12:59:39 PM
I'd like t' know who Ralf is first...
Response #26
By: Ralf
Date: 3/1/98 1:49:27 PM
Lessee... it all began on a small farm in the midwest, about 1932. My parents discovered me, Kal-El, in a crashed spacecraft, and raised me as their own. My superpowers would amuse and befuddle the citizens of Smallville until--
No wait, that's somebody else.
Okay, I got it. After witnessing the brutal murder of my father, Bruce Wayne, I vowed to spend the rest of my life avenging his death and fighting crime using a futuristic array of--
Dammit, that's not it. Uh... uh...
There's a lot of me in here. Which me do you want?
Response #27
By: rorschach
Date: 3/1/98 3:45:42 PM
grace, many of us have been trying to figure that out for over ten years, and even tho many of us have met and gotten plastered with him at various times, the question remains......
Response #28
By: Zipperhead
Date: 3/1/98 5:56:12 PM
Grace's profile suggests an old hippie type Dead Head.....LOL
Response #29
By: Gowan McGland
Date: 3/1/98 10:50:27 PM
So, does anyone know what happened to Laura and Jack Mackerel?
Response #30
By: Ralf
Date: 3/2/98 6:43:47 PM
Weren't they finally granted sainthood?
(Becoming the Holy Mackerels?)
Response #31
By: Homer The Brave
Date: 3/2/98 8:01:32 PM
Last I heard, laura and jack mackerel live in DC. jack works for internic, or uunet... can't recall which.
I think I know where Phantom is, too. Heh.
Response #32
By: Zipperhead
Date: 3/3/98 12:16:43 PM
Somehow I think we have lost sight of the subject.
Response #33
By: Ralf
Date: 3/3/98 8:53:28 PM
It's not topic drift so much as topic rip-tide...
Response #34
By: rorschach
Date: 3/4/98 8:52:38 AM
nah.. topic wind shear....
Response #35
By: Crush the State
Date: 6/5/98 10:34:11 AM
/topic #zipperhead "Viagra: A Solution for Political Equality as Misnomer"
Response #36
By: Zipperhead
Date: 6/5/98 12:28:29 PM
You make no sense asswipe.
Response #37
By: Ralf
Date: 6/5/98 7:32:30 PM
:-)
Response #38
By: Da Sissop
Date: 6/5/98 10:15:24 PM
The term "asswipe" reminds me of something.
Today, I went to lunch with a bunch of my coworkers (ork! ork!) It was sort of a combination "Let's say goodbye to Jim since his contract is nearly up" and "Well we just had a meeting and we're all together so let's go to lunch" lunch.
We went to a Chinese buffet place, and when the meal was done, the waitress brought us a tray full of fortune cookies and asswipes.
Well okay, technically they were just generic individually-wrapped "moist towelettes."
But it was beeg funny to hear my supervisor, in his French accent, look at the tray and mutter "We have cookies and..." he picked up a towelette package and tossed it back onto the tray, "and condoms."
Response #39
By: Loki
Date: 6/6/98 4:00:32 AM
You didn't take much time in programming Crush, did you Fang? I think the clincher in the "'bot not 'bot" question for me is the absence of such phrases as "wonky" and "strudel," along with the non-sequetir spasms of mildly pretentious philosophical bulldada.
Response #40
By: Homer The Brave
Date: 6/6/98 4:42:49 AM
Hey, I think "/topic #zipperhead "Viagra: A Solution for Political Equality as Misnomer"" IS FUNNY! I mean, you have to be psychic to get the joke, but once you can wrap your aura around it, THERE IT IS!
Response #41
By: Capt. Spastic
Date: 6/6/98 1:06:33 PM
Look Homer, how many times do you have to be told NOT to wrap your Aura in the house!
Response #42
By: Gowan McGland
Date: 6/6/98 2:03:23 PM
You don't have to be psychic. You just have to have used IRC once or twice.
Response #43
By: Homer The Brave
Date: 6/6/98 6:54:39 PM
Well, I've used irc more than twice, and I'm psychic, so deduce as you will.
Response #44
By: Ralf
Date: 6/7/98 10:02:20 AM
MMmm. Psychic/psychotic.
Close enough I guess.
:-)
Response #45
By: sooz
Date: 6/8/98 1:46:58 AM
I think I'll take Viagra and vote, and see what Crush thinks.
Response #46
By: Capt. Spastic
Date: 6/8/98 10:38:24 PM
You must spank all of us!
Response #47
By: benadams
Date: 6/9/98 7:40:03 PM
Zipperhead gave himself away (in response to number 10) - "no, but thanks for asking" What kind of statement is that? Sounds like a well thought out super-intelligent statement that you must've heard elsewhere. Probably, but I doubt it. Up yours.
Response #48
By: Da Sissop
Date: 6/9/98 9:12:40 PM
Howdy, Ben!
Umm, you do realize that Zipperhead probably knows where you live, and could probably arrange a Fun Fare flight to go up and kick your ass, right?
He used to be a ninja. He's bad news, man.
Response #49
By: Zipperhead
Date: 6/10/98 8:26:18 AM
BEN!!!!! My deep agression for you has returned. Your DEAD MEAT!!! By the way. Ben is in Dallas disguised as a Programmer. He is the cheapest twit you will ever meet. Why? Ben entered his posts at the Public Library. Why? They have free Internet Access and he is too cheap to buy a PC.
Response #50
By: Mycroft
Date: 6/10/98 6:52:47 PM
I don't have a PC, either. Jaka and Loki have one, and I get to use one at Work and JayHova 4x4's.
Response #51
By: Shadow Sprite
Date: 6/10/98 10:52:03 PM
I checked out internet access at the public library before, they were still using Mosaic as their primary browser, I then realized that no matter how good one might be at HTML coding (I use the word coding loosely), the page can still look like crap.
Response #52
By: benadams
Date: 7/1/98 10:47:27 PM
ok, I bought a computer (K266 - faster than a pentium 2), 17" monitor, big TV, vcr, 56.6 modem (another month before the satellite carries internet access), satellite dish with cable, so I am afraid I must resign from the title "cheapest twit you will ever meet". I have to give up such an honorable title, but as Stevie Nicks of Fleetwood Mac would say, "children grow old and I'm getting older too".
http:\\www.freeyellow.com/members4/bjadams
Response #53
By: benadams
Date: 7/1/98 10:51:12 PM
Speaking of Fleetwood Mac, I was in a cd store the other day buying a Fleetwood Mac cd. After I bought the cd, the clerk gave me the receipt and I left the store. After I left, I went home and listened to the cd. It wasn't as good as I remembered, but it was all right. It didn't give me the same pumped up feeling that my Marilyn Manson cds give me.
Response #54
By: benadams
Date: 7/1/98 10:53:52 PM
Speaking of me, I'm bored. I was driving home today thinking. Don't think and drive. I got lost three different times. I'm just kidding, I didn't get lost, but you would've if you tried to drive to my house because you don't know where it is ...
Response #55
By: Zipperhead
Date: 7/2/98 8:27:14 AM
Ben, after reading the last 3 posts I remember now why I always had a very deep aggression towards you. You Insufferable "but no longer cheap" Twit....
Thanks for the tip on the K6 being faster than the P-II...Did you do a benchmark or was it printed on the on sale sign...
Response #56
By: rorschach
Date: 7/2/98 10:57:37 AM
actually, it is my understanding that it IS faster because MMX was lisenced by intel from AMD but they only used part of it... after all, amd had some of the fastest pure risc chips around before that market died....and was resurected as recodable cisc cores....
Response #57
By: Gowan McGland
Date: 7/3/98 2:01:22 AM
And now AMD has the new K6-2 which has superduper 3DNow graphics capabilities.
My solution? Buy a 3dfx card and be done with it.
Response #58
By: Ralf
Date: 7/3/98 8:08:10 AM
Old Monster 3D cards can be had for $93 now that the Monster 3D-II is out. I paid $149 for mine last year, and it ROCKS.
www.pricewatch.com
Response #59
By: Capt. Spastic
Date: 7/6/98 1:39:32 AM
Actually Gowan, that's NOT all the K6-2 is all about. The 3D Now capability only has a very little to do with that side of 3-D capability. It's 3-D fucntionality is more to do with rendering for high end apps that require of alot of graphic computation for creation of rendered images. It also has 100 MHZ FSB, which the reg K6 of course does not. Try an find one right now though, they are about a scarce as a virgin in Las Vegas. This also means that to get the 100 MHZ FSB capability, you cannot just plugin the K6-2 into your current motherboard. And actaully, the difference between the Pentium-II and K6 is little more that just speed. The data paths involved and bus control make a difference. If you have a Pentium-II installed on a BX MB, you will see a BIG difference between a Pentium-II 266 amd a K6 266, provided you memory and other periperhals optimized for the bus speed. If you don't, then you're right. You WON'T see any difference between the 2 since the P-II in a situation where it's being held back is like having a maserati, and never taking it out of 2nd gear.
Response #60
By: Ralf
Date: 7/6/98 7:27:30 AM
Where the K6 3D will rock is on apps that have been optimized for the chip's extra 3D instructions, of which, I believe there are none.
Think of it as MMX-3D.
Response #61
By: Cleotis
Date: 7/9/98 8:31:11 PM
Here's my dilemma:
I buy a $1k video capture board from Truevision, thinking that such a high-profile reputable company will stand behind their product till the day I die, like they do their Targa line.
A mere 8 months after my purchase, I find that my beloved "Bravado" board has become a "historic product". And, to make matters worse, it will not work with FAT32 drives. No more drivers, and only guaranteed compatibility is with Win95, Build 950 (that's right - *DO NOT USE the OSR2 RELASE*). Ack!
So, since I do this software design thing for a living more or less, I realize that it's pretty important that I start beta testing my warez on a Win98 box, a Win95 box, and a Win 3.1 box.
Instead of converting my current P200 system to Win98 and buying a new capture board, I decided to take the same amount of cash it would take to replace my video capture system with a new Win98 compatible one, and instead buy a seperate computer JUST for video - put Win95 on it, and Win98 on my development machine. I'll finally get around to networking everything together (the 2 PC's and a mac), and we'll be one big happy family, in hock up to our ears.
So, what should I buy? I thought a plain 'ol PII-300 would be cool, then I saw the 400's are out, but way pricey. Now I hear about this AMD K6-2 chip and a special motherboard to run it. What should I buy? I wanna be able to upgrade when chip prices come down (the fastest motherboard I've been able to find is one that will do a 533MHz clock speed, when that chip comes out).
How can I spend my money wisely?
Response #62
By: Gowan McGland
Date: 7/10/98 12:12:58 AM
To clear something up about the "special motherboard", it's a motherboard with a 100MHz bus speed. It's not just the K6-2 that takes advantage of said board, but also the P2-350, 400 & 450.
As for upgrades, well, that's a little dicey. Sure, you can change the CPU settings in your BIOS, so getting the new chip installed is no problem. I mean, what are you gonna do with your old Slot-1 CPU?
Response #63
By: benadams
Date: 7/10/98 5:56:58 PM
ok dorks,
let's stop talking about computers and START talking about sluts and how to introduce ME to them...
Response #64
By: Da Sissop
Date: 7/10/98 7:22:51 PM
We're gonna score... uh huh huh huh huh!
Response #65
By: Cleotis
Date: 7/10/98 9:35:23 PM
Umm, so I should buy a 100Mhz motherboard. Okay. What about a K6-2 as opposed to the P2?
Response #66
By: rorschach
Date: 7/11/98 2:52:28 PM
get whichever one is the fastest for the cash... the differences will be incremental and probably not terribly apparent. generally the AMD line is cheaper for equivalent clock speeds.....
Response #67
By: Ralf
Date: 7/12/98 12:57:49 PM
I'm very pleased with my K6-200 (old-style 60MHz bus).
When I upgrade, it'll be to another AMD chip. No compatability problems to report with ANYTHING and I run a buttload of software.
Response #68
By: benadams
Date: 7/12/98 1:27:58 PM
How much is a buttload exactly? Have you measured this unit of measurement that you speak of? I would think that it would change person to person ... I bet fat people get better deals when they ask for a buttload of equipment ... oh and cleotis - you SHOULD but another 100 mhx motherboard (and give it to me) In fact, ALL of you should buy a whole bunch of stuff (and give it to me). It'll make you feel a lot better .. you can feel that you're helping others out(making this world a better place) and other stuff.
Response #69
By: Zipperhead
Date: 7/13/98 9:30:57 AM
Ben you ignorant slut.
Response #70
By: Zane T. Dark
Date: 7/14/98 2:01:23 AM
Quantifacation of the measure of a 'buttload' is much like diagraming the social circle of this person called 'Jack Shit'....facinating, but utterly futile.
Response #71
By: Capt. Spastic
Date: 7/15/98 2:04:55 AM
Ahh, but remeber. There are 2 types of 100 mhz FSB boards. There's the socket 7 boards, which the k6-2 uses, and the slot-1 boards which Pentium-II uses.
There are MARKED differences between the K6-2 and the Pentium=II, other than just physical. K6-2 is supposedly optimized for 3-D instruction sets for redering graphics and polygon sharpness. Pentium-II is just faster all the way around. Let me put it to you this way, NT Server is inheritly slower due to the nature of what it is, but you should see that way it freakin flies on one of our servers running 2 450 Pentium-II's. SMOKES!
The Pentium-II is faster, better performance in all applications and situations, but you are indeed gonna pay Intel prices. K6-2 is fast, but it's all around performance isn't as good the Intel.
Response #72
By: Ralf
Date: 7/15/98 9:51:25 PM
Hmmm. Interesting.
Given that my current interests lie in 3D rendering and highspeed Quake-II DethMaetchez, d'ya think the K2 is still the way to go?
Response #73
By: benadams
Date: 7/16/98 7:57:28 AM
That remark Capt. Spastic just made goes to show you the extent of HIS knowledge (or the teenage kid working in the computer section that he asked). You are totally wrong .. K6-266 is faster than a pentium 2 -- but you pay the price by having to upgrade your video card (4 meg, not 2). The money you save by buying a K6 can go into buying an upgraded video card (it'll still end up being cheaper AND FASTER). You're a dumbass - I bet you even went to school ... HA! What a waste of time THAT must have been. Dumbass.. You should change your login ID and have that as your name
Response #74
By: Gowan McGland
Date: 7/16/98 10:53:29 AM
You're a real people person, aren't you, Ben? You've got a real way with words.
Response #75
By: Zipperhead
Date: 7/17/98 8:12:01 AM
JJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
BAN HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ben, You do not want to get into a debate with these folks over any type of Computers. Your in way over your head!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Response #76
By: sooz
Date: 7/17/98 1:21:14 PM
Ok, it's ok, Zip. We can ignore him, like we used to ignore all your butt posts.
Response #77
By: rorschach
Date: 7/17/98 8:28:14 PM
zip, just spank him...
Response #78
By: Capt. Spastic
Date: 7/18/98 6:35:52 AM
Well Ben, coming from somone such as yourself that obviously has the social skills of someone that has only ever had sexual intercourse with another member of their immediate family, thank you very much. By the way, how DO you manage to see the monitor with dad's cock in your mouth?
And Ben you do realize that the K-6 is really just a disguise for 666 right? You have Satan in your computer. You really should get the new K-8 coming out, you'd like it much better.
Response #79
By: Shadow Sprite
Date: 7/19/98 3:59:09 PM
Buttload? Jack Shit? I'm still trying to figure out the phrase "Funny as shit". Then again, I guess kickers can find humor in cow patties, I dunno...
Response #80
By: Zipperhead
Date: 7/20/98 8:32:24 AM
hehehehehehehehehe....It worked...Bens Gone!!!!!!!!
sooz, Butts are cool!!!!!!!!!
Response #81
By: Da Sissop
Date: 7/20/98 10:15:19 PM
Butts swing!
Response #82
By: benadams
Date: 7/25/98 11:40:39 PM
BOOM! BOOM! Let me hear you say WAYYYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
WAYYYOOOOOOOOOOO!!! WAYYYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Response #83
By: Ralf
Date: 7/26/98 1:56:31 PM
This is one of those times I'm glad this isn't a RealVideo site or anything...
Response #84
By: Gowan McGland
Date: 7/29/98 8:55:50 PM
gettin' jiggy with it! nah nah nah nah nah nah nah.
Response #85
By: sooz
Date: 7/29/98 10:37:57 PM
Do you ever think "-5, or no? Nah."
Response #86
By: yodare
Date: 7/30/98 11:07:20 PM
For some reason I think the "Ale House Snerd" and this group should be combined...at least til a "Hangover's Spot" group is established...
Response #87
By: rorschach
Date: 7/31/98 12:42:18 PM
come tomorrow evening, they will be.....
Response #88
By: Zane T. Dark
Date: 8/1/98 11:38:17 PM
Shadow:
Kickers find humor in cow tipping as well...but I think the phrase 'Funny as shit' is probably a truncation, to save time in converstation. I'm quite sure the phrase was something like:
Funny as shit in a wetsuit...or
Funny as shit, runny as spit...or
Funny as shit with a hatpin through it...
Response #89
By: Tess Trueheart
Date: 8/2/98 9:48:29 AM
Hatpins?! I saw lots of neat hatpins yesterday at an antique store! Zaney..do you need me to pick one up for you? Smoooch!
Response #90
By: rorschach
Date: 8/2/98 11:43:24 AM
what EXACTLY is cow tipping anyway?
Response #91
By: Gowan McGland
Date: 8/2/98 11:46:14 AM
Cows sleep standing up.
You approach a sleeping cow. You push on said sleeping cow. Said sleeping cow going boom.
We give you: cow tipping.
Response #92
By: Da Sissop
Date: 8/2/98 12:28:26 PM
I know it sounds complicated. Perhaps this Macromedia Shockwave Virtual Cow Tipping simulator will make things clearer.
Response #93
By: Shadow Sprite
Date: 8/3/98 8:49:25 PM
Wow! I'll never have to leave the house again!