Being John Malkovich

By: Da Sissop
Date: 5/23/00 6:43:51 AM
# Replies: 29

Malkovich malkovich MALKOVICH malkovich! Malkovich malkovich malkovich malkovich? MALKOVICH!

Response #1
By: sooz
Date: 5/23/00 7:06:19 AM

So, um, how'd you feel about the movie, Jim?

Response #2
By: Da Sissop
Date: 5/23/00 9:07:28 AM

What, do I have to spell it out for you? What part of "Malkovich malkovich malkovich malkovich" do you NOT understand?

Response #3
By: rorschach
Date: 5/23/00 10:25:47 AM

all of it?

Response #4
By: sooz
Date: 5/23/00 12:13:49 PM

Dammit, Jim, I'm a transcriptionist, not a film critic!

Response #5
By: Homer The Brave
Date: 5/23/00 1:59:31 PM

There are too many people to dislike in that movie. Especially when he locks her in the cage with her monkey. What a happy, uplifting moment.

Response #6
By: Gowan McGland
Date: 5/23/00 7:18:40 PM


Malkovich. Malkovich malkovich malkovich malkovich. Malkovich malkovich malkovich. malkovich malkovich malkovich malkovich malkovich malkovich maaaaaaaaaalkovich.

Malkovich.

Response #7
By: Da Sissop
Date: 5/23/00 7:18:53 PM

Yeah, these are less than admirable characters... well except for John Malkovich (as himself) and Charlie Sheen and maybe Orson Bean... But put them in this surreal world, where they can only be loved if they're John Malkovich, and it's waaay funnycool.

Response #8
By: Da Sissop
Date: 5/23/00 7:28:35 PM

Oh, and I shoulda known GOWAN woulda seen it.

Response #9
By: Gowan McGland
Date: 5/24/00 6:46:44 AM


You kiddin, I got stock in JM Enterprises.

Response #10
By: sooz
Date: 5/27/00 9:26:03 PM

Ok, besides the Bacon movie, I rented this thing this weekend. Maybe I'm not cosmic enough. Maybe I'm a shallow, deep-as-a-dime, dingy broad.

But that was the biggest waste of time I've spent since I saw "Endless Love".

Response #11
By: The Sorcerer
Date: 5/28/00 10:55:45 AM

Haven't seen it. No idea what it's about.


Sorc'(Rev)

Response #12
By: sooz
Date: 5/28/00 4:45:33 PM

If you don't like it, people will say "Oh, you didn't get it." That's a common defense for bad movies.

WARNING - POSSIBLE, BUT NOT REALLY, SPOILERS:
The concept is that there's this little doorway in an office building. If you go through it, you get to be inside John Malcovich's head for, oh, 15 minutes or so. This seems like good fun n' games, 'till it gets (big surprise) complex.

Of course, some folks will give any movie with lesbian love 5 stars.

Grunt.

Susan, The Disgruntled Critic

Response #13
By: Da Sissop
Date: 5/28/00 6:54:20 PM

Ah, you just didn't get it.

Top 10 Reasons Why I Liked "Being John Malkovich", by Jimmy Porter, Age 34


10. Lesbian love. Well, bearing in mind that it was a woman inside John Malkovich's head.

9. John Cusack and Catherine Keener. Most anything either of these actors do is waycool.

8. Really cool puppetry.

7. Surrealistic settings. The office is on the 7 1/2th floor. And ohyeah, there's a little doorway in it.

6. When they exit John Malkovich's head, they drop from the sky onto the side of the New Jersey turnpike. When John Cusack and Catherine Keener start selling the experience, they have a *car waiting* to pick up the participants. I'm sorry, but that's just really funny.

5. John Malkovich enters his own head.

4. At some point in the future, Charlie Sheen is balding.

3. A chimp has a flashback.

2. Dialog, dialog, dialog. "So are you married?" "Yes, but enough about me...."

1. Lesbian love.

Response #14
By: sooz
Date: 5/29/00 8:09:19 AM

The chimp flashback WAS kinda cool, indeed.
The puppetry was cool.
Catherine Keener maintained about two expressions through the whole film, though, and it took way too long to get in JM's head.

Response #15
By: Da Sissop
Date: 5/29/00 6:09:27 PM

But they were really nice expressions.

Response #16
By: Capt. Spastic
Date: 10/17/00 8:03:36 AM

Ahh, and there's a new John Malkovich movie coming out soon, well, not real soon, but close enough. Shadow of the Vampire.
Already been released in Europe and Canada for crying out loud!
We have to wait until December though!

It's supposed to be about the German Movie made during the 20's called Symphony Of Horror.

Really great cast. Besides John, Willem Dafoe, Cary Elwes and Eddy Izzard!

It looks really cool!

On yet another note, go see Meet the Parents.
Funny, just damn funny.
There's a scene involving an urn that will damn near make you piss your pants.

Response #17
By: Homer The Brave
Date: 10/17/00 5:36:08 PM

Pants pissin'?? COUNT ME IN!

Response #18
By: Ralf
Date: 10/18/00 8:47:47 AM

So, for me, it'd just be pissin'?

Response #19
By: Capt. Spastic
Date: 10/19/00 11:12:59 PM

Technically...yes.
If you find theaters that let you in without pants?

Response #20
By: Ralf
Date: 10/20/00 3:54:59 AM

Sometimes in this unfriendly world, pantslessness is just a state of mind.

Response #21
By: Capt. Spastic
Date: 10/22/00 11:48:03 PM

Oh really?
Ask Pee-Wee Herman.

Response #22
By: WitchHazel
Date: 10/8/01 8:27:20 AM

Okay, I just have to give Sissop a virtual hug for liking one of my favorite movies here. I can't believe y'all didn't find this thing HILARIOUS! I laughed my ass off!

Response #23
By: bob
Date: 10/8/01 12:56:43 PM

see witch, our sense of humour is broken (although i haven't seen this one, so i have no comment)

Response #24
By: rorschach
Date: 10/10/01 10:31:43 AM

You mean I've had a sense of humor all this time and nobody told me?!?

Response #25
By: WitchHazel
Date: 10/10/01 5:41:30 PM

That's because they were afraid you'd USE it.

Response #26
By: bob
Date: 10/11/01 11:06:22 AM

hahahahaha

Response #27
By: sooz
Date: 10/11/01 11:21:16 AM

BAHAHAHAHAAHAHAH WITCH!!!

Response #28
By: WitchHazel
Date: 10/15/01 1:28:35 PM

Well, shoot. SOMEONE had to say it.

Response #29
By: Tess Trueheart
Date: 6/23/02 7:47:57 PM

I loved this movie! And it proves if a man could think like a woman he would know her sexual desires. I loved this movie!!!

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